Ever have that feeling, China, that your life, your true work, has not yet begun?
Ever feel like you’re here for something more than you’ve yet identified? And that a billion eyes are upon you, just waiting for the prophecy to unfold?
Hmmmmmm…….
And, have you also ever wanted something so badly that all your wishing, hoping, and praying kept you from seeing that you had it all along?
Precisely,
The Universe
| Tui: Joyousness, In this period, you can overcome all your difficulties with cheerfulness and lightheartedness. You’ll enjoy being with others. Share this positive energy with everyone; there is great harmony inside you and you must learn to appreciate and enjoy it. |
Lake
Lake |
Ching 58
|
I found John. And we were talking about a screenplay he wrote back in 1992. One that I did some independent re-working on in 1993. Firehouse. Josh. Edwin Shaw rehab release papers. Weird stuff, right.
So I go back to the virtual akashic and pull this up:
Sunday, May 02, 1993
Cozy & Mara Hale [screenplay]
- Mara Hale is Disease
- Cozy is the dislikable reality
- Cartoon is the human void
- Antoinette is the one reality; weighing the balance
- Little Happy is our society; hedonistic, “GenX”
- Lemonade is beautiful silence
Cozy vs. Mara Hale
[author note 030206: Cozy and Mara Hale was originally written as a three paragraph piece of prose by John McConnell who was my boyfriend's roommate. The "home base" of a multitude of psychotics, dope fiends and other miscreants of society. John McConnell was also someone I knew when I attended Firestone High School. He was a swimmer [spashfag] and I was the darkchild. He wrote it in 1992 and I expanded it to this in 1993. I have lost track of John, but if anyone knows where he is, have him get in touch with me. I still love this idea.]
Cozy: Such devotion they hold for you Mara Hale. Do you get any enjoyment from it?
MH: I enjoy it all and appreciate it. These are my children.
Cozy: Children you care nothing about. You are devoid of compassion.
MH: They ask nothing from me but my understanding.
Cozy: You understand nothing.
MH: I understand everything. I understand pain. Abandonment. The need for love. The need to be fulfilled. I understand that some thymes life and reality and all things social burn. And fire consumes. I have tolerated, endured, and the road I walk is MY shining path. I ask nothing and no one to accompany me here. But often thymes they do. And if the will is there, I invite, never force or even urge. Let thy will be done.
Cozy: It’s empty. A fence. When further down that road the blinders are removed and then they ask. They see emptiness, rot, void, pain and loneliness in its true form. Like they have never known. And they look around and they are alone. Truly alone for the first thyme.
MH: We are always alone. Even you Cozy. For all your ranting and praying do you feel anything other than the eternal loneliness? I’ve just provided a way through the pain. (Pause) So Cozy, answer my question. Do you not feel alone?
Cozy: (Pause)
MH: Cozy? Answer me… Do you not feel alone?
Cozy: Yes…of course I feel alone. But I stand alone without the aid of chemicals. I am pure.
MH: I am PURE!
Cozy: You are an illusion. A false sanctuary. You promise and ease to the pain and compound it.
MH: I promise nothing.
Cozy: You are nothing
MH: I never claimed to be (sly smile)
Chorus: MARA HALE
(end scene)
Antoinette’s Investigations
Ant: Quest for purity. Searching for something more. To fill the emptiness. The void.
Cartoon: I have something to fill it. (tapping syringe)
Ant: Oh again? I mean…yes that transforms.
MH: It transcends.
Ant: But still with thyme I question. I quiet. The answers never are there for the questions that form. Just cozy’s antagonist and Mara Hale’s agonist. Don’t you think? Don’t you wonder where it is. The fulfillment. The hope. Where happiness ran off to when the lights were dim. (Extending arm to Cartoon who shoots her up). (Relaxes…Rushes…Eyes & body change). (Eyes glazed over, looking away Antoinette contemplates). What would it be like. To have it all.
Cartoon: You have it all baby. Drugs, money, sex…me (laughs)
Ant: I have nothing, except this passage to bliss. Or erasure, perhaps. I have the parents that ignore. The unearned money as a payoff to be silent. To stay unseen. They pay me to stay high & out of their way. And I have unlimited earning potential…
Cartoon: You are droning again…(kissing Antoinette’s back and arms).
Ant: (not listening, she is used to being ignored) If I have it all as you say, then it is all a lie. If this is it, then it is nothing. I feel nothing.
Cartoon: I can make you feel.
Ant: All I have is a jar of unanswered questions. (pauses, obviously disturbed) Cartoon…listen to me. You know what I’m trying to understand. You want what I want.
Cartoon: That I do…you want more (preparing the next fix).
Ant: I do. I want more. More than this everything.
Cartoon: I’ll give you more than everything (injecting her once again).
Ant: (too high…escaping) …everything (nodding off)
Cartoon: (fading into sexuality with Antoinette) …everything.
Ant & Cartoon proceed to have sex with the integration of junkie wisdom.
Antoinette fades out into death: Neat death experience. Getting the answers she always looked for.
Antoinette: Rising up. Out. Down. In. All perspectives skewed. What is this. Who are you. (Bodies in colorful light)
- Everything you missed
- Everything you wanted to be.
- Everything you wanted to feel.
- All knowledge is here.
Antoinette: Everything…
Then it is all gone. Not available. Out of reach. All there. Just a moment away from where Antoinette was her entire life. But now it is forever out of her reach.
Cartoon Realization
Cartoon continues to have sex with Antoinette’s corpse. Nodding off droning on in the junky version of love. About 20 minutes elapse before he realizes that his partner has not responded in that same amount of thyme. Coming to a bit, he tries to rise a response in Antoinette. Realizing she is gone. He tries to collect himself enough to realize what has happened. He gets it. And gets out and paces the floor, beginning a diatribe. Antoinette naked, dead, body in the background. (Death, maybe Cozy’s right…dead body…Antoinette question answers. Being left.
Cartoon: I still don’t know. Antoinette becomes a goddess. She beat it. (Pacing…looking at Antoinette) So…are you there yet? Did you get what you were looking for? Is that what you left me for? You know I have questions. Dreams. At least I remember that I did. At least I remember that I did. I want everything too. Was Cozy right? Is there something without this? Something more. This city is too small. Too familiar, everything repeats itself. Exhausted. Stifling. Impossible to grin.
Cartoon: (fixing another shot) Mara Hale will understand. She will know. Questions. Dreams. Knowledge
Cozy: S I L E N C E
(silence fills the room. Little Happy stops played Lemonade looks at the mirror. Her eyes the only that aren’t fixed on Cozy.)Cozy: What game is being played here?
MH: No game (stroking Cartoon’s hair as he shoots up.)
Cartoon: You understand don’t you (higher)
MH: I do. I understand everything. Shhhh, it’s okay.
Cartoon: (starting to break) So, what happens now?
Cozy: Now you have to see. Broken mirrors. Everything must go.
—end of act—
Go…indiscriminate pain. Go!…ground zero…go…left foot right foot…go! wait upon the man…go…thyme crawls away…go….intentions insane…go…in this road I’m waling…go…destroying the pain.
Concerns: Main character as Antoinette. She is searching for the usual meaning of life, coming from affluent parents who give her everything except anything with meaning. She falls lost empty and alone. Her friends are more like paid servants to keep her company. She provides the friends for drugs and housing and they provide the access to a social life for Antoinette.
She constantly drones her monologue about her quest, her pain, her emptiness to the annoyance of her companions. With the exceptions of Cozy. Cozy is the narcotics antagonist. Naltrexone.
My kids school, the National Inventors Hall of Fame School for Science, Technology, Engineering and Mathematics (NIHF:STEM) sends out video emails keeping parents in the loop about what is occurring daily at the school. I can’t tell you how helpful this is. I can be at work and receive a message telling me that an event is upcoming, project is due or fund raising event is pending and can communicate with my learner about those items when we regroup at the end of each day.
When people see, for the first time, how everyone else on the planet is just another version of themselves – the same spark of God except for the pressures and desires unique to each life – some laugh, some cry, and some laugh until they cry.
May you live your life, China, so that when this day dawns for you, you’re among those who laugh and laugh and laugh.
Tallyho, ho, ho -
The Universe
| Chien: Humility, Do not forget that in life, nothing remains unchanged and everything evolves through transformation. You must learn how to evaluate every situation with the correct amount of modesty. If you are living a moment of success, re-dimension your enthusiasm; If on the other hand you are waiting for a development be patient; everything turns and re-news itself. |
Earth
Mountain |
Ching 15
|
First, China, completely forget about who, how, and when. Then, decide only upon what you want, the end result, with as much clarity as possible. I’ll shuffle the deck, the magic show will begin, and jokers won’t be all that are wild.
Gosh, you’re so much fun to watch when you read these things.
Deal,
The Universe
Every day, China, someone new falls in love with you.
Sometimes many more.
You can’t deny it,
The Universe
| Kou: Encounter, An unexpected encounter is likely. Do not go on the first impression. Try to understand what is hidden deep down under the external veil. Try to avoid dangers and you will obtain advantages and long-term success. |
Heaven
Wind |
Ching 44
|
… have a good design sense and understand the fundamentals / design principals.
… know all the major design software including the entire Adobe Creative Suite.
… have some basic video editing skills.
… know HTML, CSS, and JavaScript.
… know enough about server-side languages (PHP, ASP, Ruby, Python, etc) to understand how they work, what they do, and the possibilities of their use.
… know about servers, hosting, domain registrants, DNS, etc. Setting it up, and fixing it when it breaks.
… know OS X really well (and enough Windows to get by) or know Windows really well (and enough OS X to get by) and know a huge variety of utility software that goes with.
… are good photographers.
… can color correct photos and work in RAW.
… can cut clipping paths or otherwise extract objects from photos.
… have a killer online portfolio.
… are a personable, nice people that are good with clients.
… can help clients with anything even vaguely computer-related.
… are quick to adapt to new software and new technologies.
… can train fellow employees.
… can train clients on the use of their websites.
… are good communicators.
… are team players.
… have good taste in art, music and movies.
… are up to date on social media.
… are good at logic and deduction.
… are good at user experience and user testing.
… are SEO experts.
… know about and how to handle web accessibility (and the laws surrounding it)
… understand copyright laws.
… do progressive enhancement and graceful degradation techniques.
… can debug cross-browser problems and older browser bugs.
… can bring your own client base.
… are healthy, well groomed, and wear fancy t-shirts.
… can be on-call at all times for emergencies.
… have college degrees in design-related fields.
… own very nice and expensive computers full of expensive software.
… can design for mobile devices.
… are good typographers.
Partly tongue-in-cheek of course… but not entirely. The list of things a modern web designer should know is long, and each skill feels like it could be a lifetime in itself. Good luck learning that in a 2 or 4 year program (not that that isn’t a good start).
| Feng: Greatness, For you, this is the moment for great fortune and prosperity. You can reach your objectives and success. Make the most of this lucky situation. Remember that great opportunities only come round once and you must not let them slip away. |
Thunder
Fire |
Ching 55
|
Anything worth having, China, is worth thinking about, every day, for 5 minutes, in a dark room, wearing a really huge smile.
Shamu slippers optional.
Tallyho,
The Universe
Have you noticed, China, that all great accomplishments require 4 things:
A dream, action, patience, and a whole bunch of miracles?
The miracles part is on me.
1, 2, 3, Me -
The Universe
Last night was the January Full-Moon, also known as the Wolf Moon. It was big and delightful and made a lot of people I know a little more crazy than usual.
Mia and I started the evening when I picked her up from school. We walked out of her building and stared into the huge wondrous thing and began to howl like beasts. Then we dropped to all fours and ran to the car…
The teachers already think we’re eccentric. I can’t wait to see what happens after this!
Later I spent time with Sirius, Venus and the lunar son. We giggled and the flames rose higher…
We danced in a circle around a central fire. The Indigo Children come. Wine and song. Food and fire. Clothes, shelter and sea.
No more need for the old empire. The Indigo Children come.
My 5th grade daughter participated in the Akron District Science Fair on Saturday, January 30th, 2010 at North High School. Her project, on developing and testing a cat enrichment toy was in the field of Zoology. She received a rating of Excellent and a medal for her efforts and thus qualifies for the regional science fair later this year.
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| From NIHF:STEM Science Fair |
I’m told that about half of the NIHF:STEM school kids (about 100) participated in the science fair. Mia was hanging tight with two other STEM school girls, Mary Pat and Eman.
It was a great day. Here’s some additional photos from the science fair:
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| From NIHF:STEM Science Fair |
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| From NIHF:STEM Science Fair |
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| From NIHF:STEM Science Fair |
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| From NIHF:STEM Science Fair |
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| From NIHF:STEM Science Fair |
Do you know what we used to call you before you leapt into the jungles of time and space, China?
“Gutsy.”
Do you know what we call you now?
“An example.”
Do you know what we’ll call you when you return?
“Teacher.”
Tallyho,
The Universe
 |
|
Oh my darling frogolina, I luffs you sooo veeery mooch!
China, the trick is learning to maintain an unwavering focus upon your desired end result, your completed dream, the “finish line,” without insisting upon, or even contemplating, its means of attainment, no matter how logical, obvious, or tempting it may seem.
Tallyho,
The Universe
China, it only takes one idea, one second in time, one friend, one dream, one leap of faith, to change everything, forever.
Just one!
Yet eternity lies in the palm of your hand.
Hallelujah,
The Universe
[edit. note: Oh by the Gods, I have no idea how they do it, but they channel every fookin' story I have and write damn songs for me to connect to. MJK always has. Anyway... I totally agree MJK. I totally agree. I don't want to. But I need to.]
What if funky, confusing, gray, lonely days were just part of a “system” that, in turn, created bright, rich, happy, friendly days?
What if they were just meant to give deeper elements of your creativity a rest?
What if they were deliberately crafted holidays, of a sort, devised by your inner psyche to relieve you from the pressure of artificial expectations?
Would you still bemoan them, wonder what’s wrong with you, or fear that they’ll never end? Or, China, would they kind of tickle you pink?
You party animal, you -
The Universe
there’s an echo in my bones,
that’s been resonating for years.
it wants to get out
and make it’s mark in the sand,
before dissolving silently
into the eternities.
| Lu: Exile, Now is not the moment for starting projects; consider how everything is changeable and prone to transformation. For the moment you must rely on what you have and make it suffice. Free yourself from the sense of possessions and expectations which poison life. |
Fire
Mountain |
Ching 56
|
