Archive for June, 2009

DBW: A mind divided

// June 30th, 2009 // No Comments » // spirit

If we clearly apperceive the difference Between direct apprehension in Whole-mind And relative comprehension by reasoning In mind divided into subject-and-object, All the apparent mysteries will disappear. For that will be found to be the key Which unlocks the doors of incomprehension. – ‘Posthumous Pieces’ by Wei Wu Wei

The NoASSHOLE Rule by Robert Sutton

// June 30th, 2009 // No Comments » // funny-bone, life the universe and everything

0446526568.01._AA_SCMZZZZZZZ_V64217706_.jpg

You have to like an author who has the testicles (or ovaries) towalk awayfrom Harvard Business School Press because it wouldn’t let him use the word “asshole” in his title. (HBS Press also turned me down once, but I digress…)Robert Suttonis the author who did this; he’s a professor at Stanford in the engineering school. While I am not a big fan of profanity, “asshole” is the only word that delivers the proper connotative meaning in some situations, so forgive me for using it in this posting.

I have an early copy of Sutton’s book,The No Asshole Rule: Building a Civilized Workplace and Surviving One That Isn’t, and it’s the definitive guide to understanding, counteracting, and not becoming an asshole. I am qualified to make this judgment because (a) I’ve been an asshole a few times and (b) been a victim of assholes more than a few times.

The first step is to recognize who is an asshole. Sutton’s blog cites one method. It’s called theStarbucks TestIt goes like this: If you hear someone at Starbucks order a “decaf grande half-soy, half-low fat, iced vanilla, double-shot, gingerbread cappuccino, extra dry, light ice, with one Sweet-n’-Low and one NutraSweet,” you’re in the presence of an asshole. It’s unlikely that this petty combination is necessary—the person ordering is trying to flex her power because she’s an asshole.

A second method is to use Suttons’s dirty-dozen list of everyday asshole actions:

  1. Personal insults

  2. Invading one’s personal territory

  3. Uninvited personal contact

  4. Threats and intimidation, both verbal and non-verbal

  5. Sarcastic jokes and teasing used as insult delivery systems

  6. Withering email flames

  7. Status slaps intended to humiliate their victims

  8. Public shaming or status degradation rituals

  9. Rude interruptions

  10. Two-faced attacks

  11. Dirty looks

  12. Treating people as if they are invisible

A third method—albeit the least reliable, scientific, and fair but the most fun—is to search Google with a person’s name (or a profession) plus “asshole.” This yields some interesting results. For example, I am associated more with the word “asshole” than Terrell Owens.

Plot.jpg

How To Avoid Being an Asshole

The first $64,000 question is, “How does one avoid being an asshole?” No big surprise, but I’ve compiled a top-ten list to summarize what Sutton says:

  1. Face your past.The past is a very good predictor of future behavior. For example, were you a bully in school? If your parents and siblings were assholes, you may have caught the disease. Knowing that you’re an asshole is first step towards change.

  2. Do not make people feel oppressed, humiliated, de-energized, or belittled.If you find yourself having these effects, it’s time to change your behavior no matter what you think of yourself.

  3. Do not mistreat people who are less powerful than you.One of the sure signs of an asshole is treating people like clerks, flight attendants, and waiters in a degrading manner.

  4. Resist assholeholics from the start.The easiest time to avoid becoming an asshole is at the very beginning. Don’t think that you can do “what you have to” to fit in and can change later. It won’t happen.

  5. Walk away and stay away.Don’t be afraid to leave a bad situation. It’s unlikely you’ll change the assholes into good people; it’s much more likely that you’ll descend to their level.

  6. View acting like an asshole as a communicable disease.If you have any sense of decency, when you’re sick, you avoid contact to prevent spreading the disease. So if you act like an asshole, you’re not just impacting yourself; you’re also teaching other people that it’s okay to be an asshole.

  7. Focus on win-win.Children (young and old) think that the world is a zero-sum game. If another kid is playing with the fire truck, you can’t. As people get older they should realize that life doesn’t have to be a win-lose proposition–unless, that is, you’re an asshole.

  8. Focus on ways you are no better or even worse than others.Thinking that you’re smarter, faster, better looking, funnier, whatever than others turns people into assholes. Thinking that you’re no better or even worse keeps you humble.

  9. Focus on ways you are similar to people, not different.If you concentrate on how you and others have similar goals, desires, and passions, you’re bound to be less of an asshole. How can you treat people that are similar to you with disdain?

  10. Tell yourself, “I have enough stuff (money, toys, friends, cars, whatever).”Discontentment and envy is a major factor in becoming an asshole. If you’re happy, there’s no reason to stomp on others.

How to Deal With Assholes

Let’s say that you’re not an asshole, but you have to cope with assholes. What can you do? That’s the second $64,000 question that Sutton answers.

  1. Hope for the best, but expect the worst.One of the most frustrating aspects of dealing with assholes is that they disappoint you–making you wonder the very value of humans. Lowering your expectations can help reduce disappointment. Don’t solely lower your expectations, though, or you will slip into cynicism (and possibly turn into an asshole too.) Continue to hope for the best.

  2. Develop indifference and emotional detachment.Sutton may be the only author who has the insight and courage to recommend that being indifferent and detached may be a good thing in work environments. If it permits you to survive, then it is. In other words, don’t let the jerks get to you.

  3. Look for small wins.Small victories can keep you going. Most assholes pride themselves in total control and absolute domination. Any victory, no matter how small, can keep you going. Rest assured that small victories can lead to winning the war.

  4. Limit your exposure.You can do what you can to avoid meetings and interactions with assholes. This involves finding or building pockets of “safety, support, and sanity,” to use Sutton’s words. He cites an example of a nurse’s lounge as a refuge from an asshole doctor.

  5. Expose them.In Sutton’s blog he mentionsMarge’s Asshole Management Metric. This refers to four-point system from 0 to 3. Marge, the boss, would point to people who were behaving like assholes and hold up one, two, or three fingers according to this code:

    • 1 = You are a normal person who can occasionally assert yourself on an issue you are passionate about, but you handle yourself in a non-confrontational way in nearly all occasions.

    • 2 = You can consistently assert yourself in a non-confrontational way and are occasionally an asshole, but you feel horrible about it afterwards, and you may or may not apologize (but you probably will have to confess your remorse to someone).

    • 3 = You can consistently be an asshole and you either do not recognize this or you simply enjoy it.

    By the way, 0 in her system means this:

    You are a very nice person, and very passive. No one can say a word against you and would never think to call you an asshole.

    If you are safe in your position, then calling assholes out is a good way to deal with them.

  6. De-escalate and re-educate.This strategy requires that the asshole you’re dealing with isn’t a “chronic,” “certified,” and “flagrant” asshole. It means meeting asshole behavior with calmness (instead of either similar behavior or fear) and trying to re-educate the person about how he’s behaving.

  7. Stand up to them.Funny thing about assholes: Standing up to them shouldn’t necessarily scare you. While I was an Apple employee, I was in a meeting with a highly placed Apple exec and Apple’s ad agency. The ad agency person showed the new television spots and said he’d give a copy to the Apple exec and me. The Apple exec told the agency person not to give one to me. I spoke up: “Are you saying you don’t trust me?” The Apple exec answered: “Yes.” To which I replied, “That’s okay because I don’t trust you either.” You know what? The sun rose the next day, and my family still loved me.

Quiz: Which Archangel Are You?

// June 30th, 2009 // No Comments » // funny-bone, spirit

Well, how’s that for providence?

from: http://www.beliefnet.com/Inspiration/Angels/Quizzes/Which-Archangel-Are-You.aspx

You are Uriel, Archangel of the North.

Although not officially recognized as an archangel by the Catholic church, you are often recognized as the fourth archangel next to Gabriel, Michael, and Raphael. You have a strong presence in the apocrypha, and you are best known for interpreting God’s seven visions to the prophet Ezra in the second Book of Esdras. Soothing, wise, and generous, you are passionate about philanthropy and eco-friendly products that protect Mother Earth. Those who seek forgiveness and salvation look to you as their patron. The Coptic Christians celebrate your feast day on July 28.

oh..my feast day is coming up!  Let’s have BBQ!!!

Paulo Coelho: “Accepting paradoxes”

// June 29th, 2009 // No Comments » // spirit

“It’s odd,” the warrior muses to himself. “I have met so many people who, at the first chance they get, try to show the worst of themselves. They hide their interior strength through aggressiveness and disguise the fear of solitude with an air of independence. They don’t believe in their own capacity but are always extolling their virtues to the four winds.”

The warrior reads these messages in many men and women he knows. He is never fooled by appearances and insists on remaining silent when others try to impress him. But he uses the opportunity to correct his flaws – since people are always a good mirror.
A warrior puts to good use every opportunity to teach himself and to admit his own contradictions.

Catching Fireflies with Mia

// June 29th, 2009 // No Comments » // House-of-Chaos, family, personal

Have I mentioned how cool it is to be a mom?  Last night my kid and I were in our new backyard at dusk catching fireflies.  Mia caught most of them. 

Here’s a photo of her bounty:

A Jar full of Fireflies

A Jar full of Fireflies

and here is Mia, proudly displaying her catch.
Mia with her Fireflies

Mia with her Fireflies

Air Powered Car?

// June 29th, 2009 // No Comments » // life the universe and everything, news

http://www.mdi.lu/english/airpod.php

it says:

AIRPod is the culmination of MDI studies on pollution and urban mobility. This concept will be the first to leave the production line in spring 2009. MDI will respond to an invitation to tender of the city of Paris, “Autolib’”, and is already the subject of applications for various municipalities.

TimberTop is Empty, the Temple is in Ashes

// June 29th, 2009 // No Comments » // life the universe and everything

Timber top is empty. The keys have been turned in and I’m officially moved out. Last night I burned all physical remnants of my relationship with P; the temple, all photos and writings, Candle’s urn, Z’s bones, and every stupid, petty thing he ever gave to me. He’s officially dead. The man I loved is no more and has turned into some dead, malvolent, empty husk.

Oh well. AS IT IS…SO BE IT.

Meanwhile I have a nice new place, great friends and a beautiful (albeit crazy) family. I’m a lucky, lucky girl.

Moving on now…y’all have a nice day.

Horoscope: June 29, 2009

// June 29th, 2009 // No Comments » // magick, personal

Daily Sun Sign horoscope
Libra – 29 Jun 2009
You will dislike more than usual being passed over for attention or praise at work. You want to be noticed, not made to feel one of the crowd. You also need to belong, to be loved, cuddled and cos­se­ted. So look for reassuring companions who will give you a little more help and support than usual and be a good anchor for you.

Daily Vedic Moon Sign horoscope
Capricorn – 29 Jun 2009
 Today is the day when you could wake up to the viewpoint of others and understand the constructive criticism they had offered for your benefit. You could gain a deep understanding of the requirements of your colleagues and may be more than willing to help them overcome some of the problems that they are facing.

Daily Chinese Sign horoscope
Dog – 29 Jun 2009
 The day will go along peacefully if you suppress your temper. You can be cheerful as a child with a lollipop, and then lose complete control in a second. Trivial matters aren’t worth working yourself up over. Deal patiently with family, lovers and coworkers. Spending time at home is likely to bring you the most happiness, good news because your social life probably won’t be eventful.

The First Quarter of the Moon
The precise moment of the First Quarter was 7:29 am Jun, 29 2009
A stressful period of time when there is a strong desire to accomplish something, to change, and to show oneself. However, before undertaking anything, first stop and think: is it really needed? Obstacles multiply at this time and contradictions sharpen. Plans developed under this influence often turn out to be unrealistic because people tend to overvalue their abilities.

The Moon is in Libra until 12:20 am Jul, 1 2009
Increased sociability, interest in new acquaintances, a desire for mutual understanding. Partnerships are in focus. Good for social gatherings, celebrations, business meetings and a romantic rendezvous. However, your ability to make decisions suffers because people are more prone to doubts and hesitation now.

Horoscope for Libra
The Moon’s return to your sign and your 1st House of Personality may be more comfortable for you than it is for others. Your moods are like a pendulum today, swinging one way and then the other. But even if you are at ease with the ebb and flow of your emotional tides, your inconsistency could drive someone else crazy. Keep in mind that you are not responsible for anyone else’s reactions, but it still pays to be kind.

Killing Joke – Death and Resurrection Show

// June 29th, 2009 // No Comments » // life the universe and everything

‘effe “Invocation” … I’m all about the Death and Resurrection Show.  Get yer tickets here!  Come one, come all.  Remember kiddies, V is for Vendetta!  “Shall we play a game???”

Mark out the points
Build the pyre
Assemble different drummers
Light up the fire
Put on your masks
And animal skins
Illumination, illumination
Listen to the drums
Between each beat, each beat of the drum

O beloved mother of liberty
Hold me in your arms

Burn burn, burn brightly
Burn burn, burn white heat

And the day will come
Before the lights go out
Who will you turn to
Who will you turn to
Choose the crucifixion
Or Osiris slain
Recurring themes, time again.

Illumination, illumination
Burn burn, burn white heat

Oh how ingenious the centuries of lies
Ezekiel?s chariots streak across the skies
Holy books and history texts forget
Because we know
Souls are recycled in the death and
Resurrection show

O beloved mother of liberty
Come to me

Everything I?m taught, amounts to nought
Everything I learn, the fire shall burn
Notions of myself that when I?m not
Whoever I was is now lost

Illumination, illumination
Burn burn, burn brightly
Burn burn, burn white heat
Oh how ingenious the centuries of lies
Ezekiel?s chariots streak across the skies
Holy books and history texts forget
Because we know
Souls are recycled in the death and
Resurrection show

O beloved mother of liberty
Come to me

Burn away all my impurities
Hold me in your arms

Burn burn, burn brightly
Burn burn, burn white heat

Weekly ChinaTwits on 2009-06-28

// June 28th, 2009 // No Comments » // life the universe and everything

Uncle Setnakt Concice Magickal Path

// June 28th, 2009 // No Comments » // magick

The ever witty Uncle Setnekt describes the usual magickal path: (I particularly like the first point, since being a mage of ANY level usually mean you can manifest up enough Will for a job and some money.  If you can’t get that…what good are your magicks?)

The magical path usually works this way.
  1. I am being kicked out of my hovel for no rent.  I try magic.  I get to stay another month somehow.
  2. I want better magical books.  I try magi.  I get them.
  3. I want women and gold.  I sell my soul.  I get women and gold.
  4. I am very old (60).  I want enlightenment.  I may get it.

and continues to say:

Now we need magical Curiosity (Runa), Magical Discernment, an Understanding of Magical Momentum (Which Magistra Webb calls Wyrd), but who do we teach these things?  To whom should we teach them?  Have we Learned them?

Have we curiosity?  Discernment?  An understanding of Magical Momentum?  Have we learned them?  And to whom shall we teach them?  I worked recently with a magickal partner who after that relationship was over has trampled what I though of as the pinions of magickal noble code.  He betrayed every confidence I thought were sacred, and profaned what I thought as inviolate.  I have learned that his actions show that his is not a noble and not worth my attentions.  But I *taught* him things, which he is now choosing to misuse. 

Oh well, I’ll let the Universe do it’s thing to take care of that nonsense, but I’ll be mindful if I cross this path again.  I’ll use this as an opportunity to relearn discretion; to let a being match his actions with his very pretty words before I believe a stitch of them.  To see how well s/he can sew the five arenas of magick into the five spiritual bodies.   I will learn to place great emphasis upon the last part of:

  • To Dare
  • To Will
  • To Know (and)
  • To Be Silent…

Because some folks are just more trouble than they are worth, and I should know better.

Raistlin: Crysania

// June 28th, 2009 // No Comments » // life the universe and everything, magick

“Curiouser and curiouser”, said Alice…

Crysania — Raistlin’s biggest love-affair, though really their relationship was little more than a masked power-struggle.  Raven haired, fair skinned, and generally regarded as annoying to the point of ridiculousness, the Revered Daughter of Paladine was Raistlin’s key into the Abyss.  Raistlin seduced her into accompanying him, using the lure of the chance to “convert” him — as well as sheer physical attraction — as bait.  He manipulated her, and she used him, and despite a few lusty moments, there was generally a lot of tension and not a lot of understanding between the two of them.  Raistlin eventually left her to die in the Abyss; she was rescued by Caramon and escaped the whole messy situation blind but much wiser for the experience.  She became a formidable cleric in the end, but she started out a real cream-puff.

http://www.raistland.com/cheat-bios/cheatsheet.htm

From MageJournal: 121408:2227

// June 28th, 2009 // No Comments » // magick

Stupid possessor spirits using me as their vehicle:

ASAM – NATU – RA

“Exiled prince be not confused, there is a mindful king.  He has forgotten the face of his father.  It is undone.”

DBW: Two Mistakes

// June 28th, 2009 // No Comments » // spirit

There are two mistakes one can make along the road to truth — not going all the way, and not starting. – Buddha

“The Passion” by Jeanette Winterson

// June 28th, 2009 // No Comments » // life the universe and everything

This book took me a minute to get into.  At first it wasn’t her usually grab-you-by-the-ballzac and sew-you-together-with beautiful words she usually intros with, so I was about 40 pages into this volume because I found myself turning pages without realizing how much I’d actually read.

This book is set during the Napoleonic Wars and tells the story of Henri; a plain French soldier, Villanell, a red-haired, boatman’s daughter with webbed feet who works as a  ”pleasure girl” and who is in search of her heart, which her husband has gambled away.  It is set in Venice.

And now the notes:

  • p.68] “Somewhere between the swamp and the mountains.  Somewhere between fear and sex.  Somewhere between God and the Devil passion is and the way there is sudden and the way back is worse.
  • p.122] “There is no sense in loving someone you can only wake up to by chance.”
  • p.123] “She’d never be faithful.  She’d laugh in my face.  I will always be afraid of her body because of the power it has.
    “Whatever she touches, she reveals.”
    “…it’s unnatural for her to be still.”
  • p.133] “You play, you win, you play, you lose.  You play”
    “There is no such thing as a limited victory.  You must protect what you have won.  You must take it seriously.”
    “The impulse to be reckless again, to go barefoot, like you used to, before you inherited all those shoes.”
  • p.145]  ”…it may be that you are happy, but the one who took your heart away wields final power.”
    "Passion will work in the fields for seven years for the beloved and on being cheated work for seven more, but passion, because it is nobel, will not long accept another’s left-overs."
    “When passion comes late in life for the first time, it is harder to give up.”
    “And if they do, you will have to strap them to the mast as the boat pulls away because the siren calls are terrible to hear and they may go mad at the thought of what they have lost.”
    “Another is to learn to juggle; to do as we did for nine nights.  This soon tires the hands if not the heart.
    “…The third is to refuse that passion as one might sensibly refuse a leopard in the house, however take it might seem at first.”
  • p.146] "There is never enought ot eat, never enough garden for your love."
    “…haunted by the ghost of a leopard.”
    “When passion comes late in life it is hard to bear.”
    “He touches my heart, but he does not send it shattering through my body.”
  • p.147] “Passion does not take disappointment well.”
  • p.148] “I have learnt to take pleasure without always questioning the source.”
  • p.151] "I keep getting letters from Villanelle.  I send them back to her unopened and I never reply.  Not because I don’t think about her, not because I don’t look for her from my window every day.  I have to send her away because she hurts me too much.
    There was a time, some years ago I think, when she tried to make me leave this place, though not to be with her.  She was asking me to be alone again, just when I felt safe.  I don’t ever want to be alone again and I don’t want to see any more of the world.”  [this is sad because it reminds me of P...too afraid to be what he might be.  Clinging to his delusions]
  • p.152] “It is easier not to see her” [ coward!  Where is your commitment to passion?]
  • p.156] “Look at that’, and that was always an ordinary treasure brought to life.”
  • p.158] "My passion for her, even though she could never return it, showed me the difference between inventing a lover and falling in love.  The one is aobut you, the other is about someone else."

Buddhism: Your Daily Meditation

// June 28th, 2009 // No Comments » // spirit

The only real failure in life is not to be true to the best one knows. – Buddha

DBW: Nobel 8 Fold Path

// June 27th, 2009 // No Comments » // spirit

The Noble Eightfold Path: Right Views, Right Thoughts, Right Speech, Right Conduct, Right Livelihood, Right Effort, Right Mindfulness, Right Concentration.

Uncle Setnakt and “The Mirror Self” of Duality

// June 27th, 2009 // No Comments » // life the universe and everything, magick

Uncle Setnakt’s says, regarding “The Mirror” of duality:

However the great Secret of Setian thought is the Mirror.  Set created  Har-Wer to define himself.  Set does not chose the Cosmos as  Opponent/Initiator.  Set chooses a Self like Him, but more closely bound to  the laws of the causal universe than Him to interact with.  In order for me  to refine myself  I have to initiate others.  I have to empower others.  I  have to watch what they do to Know myself.

and goes on to posit a Setian koan:

Is a Mirror Self  a Duality?

or

Do you own your Reflection?

and continues to give a few links for us all to read up:

Notice that last one is called “Shadow People“  like my sculptures.  Coincidence?

“Eleven Minutes” by Paulo Coelho

// June 26th, 2009 // No Comments » // life the universe and everything

Just finished “Eleven Minutes” by Paulo Coelho, the write of “Warrior of the Light” and “The Alchemist” and other great books.  This book was the story of Maria, a young girl from Brazil, who is in search of her own personal “greatness” and adventure.    She gets swept off to Switzerland, where she’s promised to be a samba dancer, but ends up being held almost hostage in a scheme where she has to work seven days a week and all of her promised earnings go for her room and keep and she barely makes anything to get herself home.

In this dismal circumstance she decides to take matters into her own hands and becomes a prostitute.  She figures the hours and pay are better and she’s more in control of her own destiny.

She’s incredibly business-minded and sets her goal to work for six months and to return to Brazil with experience and enough money to buy a small farm for her family.  Of course, she falls in love unexpectedly and things change.

She’s faced with the dilema or following her head or her heart and this book details the questions she asks and the experiences she has which contribute to that exploration.

Now, my notes:

  • Introduction: “…Her sins, which are many, are forgiven; for she loved much; but to whom little is forgiven, the same loveth little.”  - Luke 7: 37-47
  • Hymn to Isis: “For I am the first and the last
    I am the venterated and the despised
    I am the prostitute and the saint
    I am the wife and the virgin
    I am the mother and the daughter
    I am the arms of my mother
    I am barren and my children are many
    I am the married woman and the spinster
    I am the woman who gives birth and she who never procreated
    I am the consolation for the pain of birth
    I am the wife and the husband
    And it was my man who created me
    I am the mother of my father
    I am the sister of my husband
    And he is my rejected son
    Always respects me
    For I am the shameful and the magnificent one”
  • p.1] “…we all have one foot in a fairy tale and the other in the abyss, let’s keep that beginning.”
  • p.4] “…and kept blaming her own stupidity in running away from the very thing she most wanted.”
  • p.9] “When we meet someone and fall in love, we have a sense that the whole universe is on our side. And yet if something goes wrong, there is nothing left! How is it possible for the beauty that was there only minutes before to vanish so quickly? Life moves very fast. It rushes from heaven to hell in a matter of seconds”
  • p.10] “When she arrived home, though, she allowed her universe to crumble; she cried all night, suffered for the next eight months and concluded that love clearly wasn’t made for her and that she wasn’t made for love.”
  • p.16] “I see more clearly how fragile men are, how inconstant, insecure and suprising they are…”
  • p.17] “By then, however, Maria knew how to use a man, without being used by him.”
  • p.26] “If I’m looking for true love, I first have to get the mediocre loves out of my system… no one owns anything, that everything is an illusion… Anyone who has lost something they thought was theirs forever (as has happened often enough to me already) finally comes to realize that nothing really belongs to them.”
  • p.37] “I can choose either to be a victim of the world or an adventurer in search of treasure.  It’s all a question of how I view my life.”
  • p.53]  ”And Maria thought about the little boy who had asked to borrow a pencil, about the young man who had kissed her and how she had kept her mouth closed, about her excitement at seeing Rio for the first time, about the men who had used her and given nothing back, about the passions and loves lost along the way.  Despite her apparent freedom, her life consisted of endless hours spent waiting for a miracle, for true love, for an adventure with the same romantic ending as she had seen in films and read about in books.  A writer once said that it is not time that changes man, nor knowledge; the only thing that can change someone’s mind is love.  What nonsense!  The person who wrote that clearly knew only one side of the coin.”
  • p.38] “Or rather, that’s what I used to be like:  someone pretending to know everything, hidden away in my own silence…”
  • p.73] “…it’s as if she started ages ago, as if she had done this all her life.  (…) But life was teaching her — very fast — that only the strong survive.  To be strong, she must be the best, there’s no alternative. (…)  I’m a soul that has a visible part called a body.” [no one cares who gets second]
  • p.81] “…she needed to find some way of freeing her clients from the enormous pressure they all seemed to be under… releasing tension in the soul could be as lucrative as releasing tension in the body.”
  • p.83] “…but there’s always one woman who frightens them and forces them to submit to her caprices.”
  • p.86] “Eleven minutes.  The world revolved around something that only took eleven minutes.”
  • p.88] “…and every time she borrowed a book from the library she was confirmed in her view that no one wrote properly about the eleven most important minutes of the day.”
  • p.90] “Well, that’s a lie:  freedom only exists when love is present.”
    “…in the form of a man who understands me and does not make me suffer.”
    “In love, no one can harm anyone else; we are each of us responsible for our own feelings and cannot blame someone else for what we feel.”
    “It hurts when I lost each of the various men I fell in love with.  Now, though, I am convinced that no one loses anyone, because no one owns anyone.”
  • p.105] “You have a glow about you.  The light that comes from sheer willpower, the light of someone who has made important sacrifices in the name of things she things are important.  It’s in your eyes — the light is in your eyes.”
  • p.109] “Well, there are really three of me, really, depending on who I’m with.  There’s the Innocent Girl, who gazes admiringly at the man, pretending to be impressed by his tales of power and glory.  Then there’s the Femme Fatale, who pounces on the most insecure and, by doing so, takes control of the situation and relieves them of responsibility, because then they don’t have to worry about anything.  And, finally, there’s the Understanding Mother, who looks after those in need of advice and who listens with an all-comprehending air to stories that go in one ear and out the other.  Which of the three would you like to meet?”
  • p.110] “I’ll come and see you so that you can save me.”
  • p.111] “it hadn’t been her fault,  but the fault of that insecure little boy, who had given up after his first attempt.  They were children and that’s how children are —  neither she nor the bow had been in the wrong, and that gave her a great sense of relief, made her feel better; she hadn’t betrayed the first opportunity that life had presented her with.  We all do the same thing; it’s part of the initiation of every human being in search of his or her other half; these things happen.”
  • p.111] “Here, in my diary, I am aware that there are certain phrases which are not written by me, but by a woman full of “light”; I am that woman though I refuse to accept it.”
  • p.116] “…but he should understand my insecurities, because I’m a woman, I’m fragile, and when I’m in that place, I’m a different person.”
  • p.117] “She was terrified.  She was beginning to realize that after long months of self-control, the pressure, the earthquake, the volcano of her soul was showing signs that it was about to erupt, and the moment that this happened, she would have no way of controlling her feelings.
  • p.119] “Other people thank exactly the opposite:  they surrender themselves without a second thought, hoping to find in passion the solutions to all their problems.  They make the other person responsible for their happiness and blame them for their possible unhappiness.    They are either euphoric because something marvolous happened or depressed because something unexpected has just ruined everything.”
  • p.121] “And at that moment, she accepted everything that fate placed in her path.”
  • p.126] “You know what I mean, Maria.  Teach me.  Perhaps that will save me, perhaps it will save you and bring us both back to life.”
  • p.127] “They had only met once before and yet they already needed each other.”
    “…it would be disatrous!”
  • p.128] “Did you ask me what I wanted?”
    “No, I didn’t.”
    “Well, the person you’re with has to exist too.  Think of her.  Think if she wants whisky or gin or coffee.  Ask her what she wants.”
    “What would you like to drink.”
  • p.129] “…recognizing the other person and knowing that she or he was there.” [ WOW!  I think this was the source of the void I felt with *]
  • p.132] “I want to get used to the feeling, knowing that you’re with me, even when you’re not by my side.”
  • p.133] “Profound desire, true desire is the desire to be close to someone.  From that point onwards, things change, the man and the woman come into play, but what happens before — the attraction that brought them together — is impossible to explain.  It is untouched desire in it’s purest state.”"When the moment comes, they do not hesitate, they do not miss an opportunity, they do not let slip a single magic moment, because they respect the importance of each second.”
  • p.135] “Dreams like theirs never lasted long”
  • p.138] “I allowed myself to fall in love for one simple reason:  I’m not expecting anything to come of it.”
    “…but I couldn’t stand living without love any longer; I had reached my limit.”
    “It’s enough just to love him.”
    “…really important meetings are planned by the souls long before the bodies see eachother.”
  • p.139]  ”Generally speaking, these meetings occure when we reach a limit, when we need to die and be reborn emotionally.  These meetings are waiting for us, but more often than not, we avoid them happening.”
  • p.148] “…no one can know how to humiliate another person if they themselves have not experienced humiliation.”
  • p.149] “The Marquis de Sade, said that the most important experiences a man can have are those that take him to the very limit; that is the only way we learn, because it requires all our courage.”
  • p.151] “I am two women: one wants to have all the joy, passion and adventure that life can give me.  The other wants to be a slave to routine, to family life, to the things that can be planned and achieved.  I’m a house wife and a prostitute, both of us living in the same body and doing battle with each other.
    “…one universe destroys the other.”
  • p.159] “human beings were once divided and now seek the embrace that will reunite them.  That is our instinct.  But it is also our reason for putting up with all the difficulties we meet in that search.”
  • p.165] “…it can drive people away, generally speaking, it brings those who are important to us closer.  It is an emotion chosen by my soul, and it is so intense that it can infect everything and everyone around me.”
    “Each day I choose the truth by which I try to live.  I try to be practical, efficient, professional.  But I would like to be able to always choose desire as my companion.  Not out of obligation, not to lessen my loneliness, but because it is good.  Yes, very good.”
  • p.171] “The strongest love is the love that can demonstrate its fragility.”
  • p.172] “The danger lies in focusing on that pain, giving it a particular person’s name, and keeping it always present in your thoughts.”
  • p.173] “good enough” is very different from “best”. [and you know it!]
  • p.176] “You’re like me.  You’re not here for the thousand francs, but out of a sense of guilt and dependency, because of your various complexes and insecurities.  That is neither good nor bad, it’s simply human nature.”
  • p.179] “…that you only know yourself when you go beyond your limits.”
  • p.183] “..I the master, but by only power ws to push you in the direction of your own freedom.”
  • p.185] “…between two beings who want to be close, but can only be so by inflicting suffering.”
    “”It was as if the agony that one inflicted on the other was necessary, fundamental to life.”
  • p.190] “…closer to God.”
    “The art of sex is the art of controlled abandon.” [ WOW!]
  • p.191] “But life had chosen otherwise, and today she had got throught he whole day without once having to make herself concentrate on the sounds around her or on the present moment, simply because she hadn’t thought about Ralf; she had discovered other more interesting things to think about.”
  • p.194] “…we die wanting to punish everyone else because we feel impotent, ill-used and unhappy.”
    “But I will never again come looking for you.”
  • p.195] “shu-gen-do”  - the beauty of pain, except that the pain was imposed by nature, not by man.
  • p.203] “hetaera” – the female companion who accompanied businessmen on their trips (in ancient Sumeria)
  • p.204] sacred prostitution.
    “When I am sitting at the door of a tavern, I, Ishtar, the goddess, am prostitute, mother wife, divinity.  I am what people call life, Although you call it death.  I am what people call Law, Although you call it Delinquency.  I am what you seek, and what you find.  I am what you scattered and the pieces you now gather up.”
  • p.205] “…and any woman who steps out of line is automatically dubbed a prostitute.”
  • p.208] “Original sin was not the apple that Eve ate, it was her belief that Adam needed to share precisely the thing she had tasted.  Eve was afraid to follow her path without someone to help her, and so she wanted to share what she was feeling.”
  • p.224] “…was all a question of selling her time, like everyone else.  Doing things she didn’t want to do, like everyone else.  Putting up with horrible people, like everyone else.”
  • p.231] “The further off they are, the close to the heart are all those feelings that we try to repress and forget.  If we’re in exile, we want to store away every tiny memory of our roots.  If we’re far from the person we love, everyone we pass in the street reminds us of them.”
  • p.233] “…she knew the time had come to stop.  Not many people do.”
  • p.238] “…those people wished they could be doing the same thing.  That was the real scandal.”
  • p.245] ‘…meets someone, falls in love, loses them and finds them again.”
    “…the desire to have a good orgasm with one’s partner lasted only for the first few years; then the frequency of orgasms dimished, but no one talked about it…”
  • p.254] “…I would end with the story of a man passionately in love with me, and who would always be mine, because I had visited his soul.”
  • p.256] “…and I know you would take this not as a criticism, but as another way to improve communication between our souls.”
    “…boldness, the courage to go beyond what people conventionally call “making love.’”
  • p.257] “…at this stage in my life, I had notihng to lose by being honest with myself and with the woman I wanted to have by my side.”
  • p.258] “…they were vulnerable.”
  • p.259] “…because each of us was always trying to impress the other — this was so stupid and so unworthy of our relationship!”
  • p.260] “…the two missing fragments needed to complete the universe.”
  • p.264] “Come and bless me with your hope, and stay as long as you can.”

Books

// June 26th, 2009 // No Comments » // life the universe and everything

In the past week I’ve read four books:

  1. “The Valkyries” by Paulo Coelho
  2. “The Passion”  by Jeanette Winterson
  3. “Written on the Body” by Jeanette Winterson
  4. “Eleven Minutes” by Paulo Coelho

Yeah…four books, two authors.  What can I say, they are good.  So I went through and hi-lighted sections that were particularly impactful to me.  Stuff I resonated with.  I’m going to make four posts; one for each book, so I can refer back here and see my own personal “readers digest” version of the book.

Stay tuned…

Bat For Lashes “pearl’s Dream”

// June 26th, 2009 // No Comments » // life the universe and everything

http://www.babelgum.com/html/clip.php?clipId=3020419

There’s a place I must go
There’s a place I must go
It’s not a place I have seen
But I’ll get there in a blue dream

Down an ocean road
Past a sign that says ‘good love town’
Into a darkness where the stars do drown
Where the starry me needs to be free

And when the battle was done
I was promised my sun
But with a thousand nights gone
To any kingdom I run

And when the battle was done
I was promised my sun
But with a thousand knights gone
To any kingdom I run

There’s a place I must go
There’s a place I must go
For my heart is a child
That stumbles lonely for the arms of the wild

Hear the desert sigh
Sing the city’s lullaby
The giant iris of the wide blue sky
Showing me the way

And when the battle was done
I was promised my son
But with a thousand knights gone
To any kingdom I run

And when the battle was done
I was promised my son
But with a thousand knights gone
To any kingdom I run

You know that it’s time to go up, up, up, up, up
Had a big machine riding your shoulders
You know that it’s time to go up, up, up, up, up
Had a big machine riding your shoulders
You know that it’s time to go up, up, up, up, up
Had a big machine riding your shoulders

The Warrior of Light & Faith

// June 26th, 2009 // No Comments » // life the universe and everything, magick, personal, spirit

by Paulo Coelho

“The warrior of light, once he has learned how to use a sword, discovers that his equipment is still incomplete – he needs armour.
He sets off in search of this armour and he listens to the advice of various salesmen.
‘Use the breastplate of solitude,’ says one.
‘Use the shield of cynicism’, says another.
‘The best armour is not to get involved in anything.’ says a third.
The warrior, however, ignores them.  He calmly goes to his sacred place and puts on the indestructible cloak of faith.
Faith parries all blows.  Faith transforms poison into crystalline water.

Warrior of the Light: Magic Instant

// June 26th, 2009 // No Comments » // spirit

The magic instant  
  We have to take risks. We can only truly understand the miracle of life when we let the unexpected manifest itself.

Every day – together with the sun – God gives us a moment in which it is possible to change everything that makes us unhappy. Every day we try to pretend that we don’t realize that moment, that it doesn’t exist, that today is just the same as yesterday and will be the same as tomorrow. But if you pay attention, you can discover the magic instant. It may be hiding at the moment when we put the key in the door in the morning, in the silence right after dinner, in the thousand and one things that all seem the same to us. This moment exists – a moment when all the strength of the stars passes through us and lets us work miracles.

Happiness is at times a blessing – but usually it’s a conquest. The magic instant helps us to change, drives us forward to seek our dreams. We shall suffer and go through quite a few difficult moments and face many a disappointment – but this is all transitory and inevitable, and eventually we shall feel proud of the marks left behind by the obstacles. In the future we will be able to look back with pride and faith.

Poor are those who are afraid of running risks. Because maybe they are never disappointed, never disillusioned, never suffer like those who have a dream to pursue. But when they look back – for we always look back – they will hear their heart saying: “What did you do with the miracles that God sowed for your days? What did you do with the talent that your Master entrusted to you? You buried it deep in a grave because you were afraid to lose it. So this is your inheritance: the certainty that you have wasted your life.”

Poor are those who hear these words. For then they will believe in miracles, but the magic instants of life will have already passed.

We must listen to the child that we once were, and who still lives within us. This child understands about magic instants. We can muffle his sobbing, but we can’t hush his voice.

If we aren’t reborn, if we don’t see life again with the innocence and enthusiasm of childhood, then there is no more sense to living.

There are many ways to commit suicide. Those who try to kill their body offend God’s law. Those who try to kill their soul also offend God’s law, although their crime is less visible to the eyes of man.

Let us be heedful of what the child within us has to say. Let’s not feel ashamed of it. Let’s not allow it to feel afraid, because it’s lonely and is scarcely ever heard.

Let’s allow the child within us to take the reins of our existence a little. This child says that one day is different from another.

Let’s make the child feel loved again. Let’s please this child – even if it means acting in a way that we’re not used to, even if it seems foolish in the eyes of others.

Remember that the wisdom of men is madness before God. If we listen to the child we bear in our soul, our eyes will shine once more. If we don’t lose contact with this child, we won’t lose contact with life.

Let’s live all the magic instants of 2009!

Love

There is always someone in the world waiting for someone else, whether in the middle of the desert or in the heart of some big city. And when these two people’s paths cross and their eyes meet, the whole of the past and the whole of the future lose all importance, and there only exists that moment and that incredible certainty that everything under the Sun was written by the very same Hand. The Hand that awakens Love and creates a sister soul for everyone who works, rests and seeks treasures under the Sun. Were it not for this, the dreams of the human race would make no sense.

I Ching: “What do I do with all of this hostility from [x]“

// June 26th, 2009 // No Comments » // magick, personal

Chien / Obstruction

 above K’an The Abysmal, Water
 below Kên Keeping Still, Mountain
--- --- 

The Judgement

Obstruction. The southwest furthers.
The northeast does not further.
It furthers one to see the great man.
Perseverance brings good fortune.

The Image

Water on the mountain:
The image of Obstruction.
Thus the superior man turns his attention to himself
And molds his character.

The Lines

Six in the second place means:
The king’s servant is beset by obstruction upon obstruction,
But it is not his own fault
.

 Nine in the fifth place means:
In the midst of the greatest obstructions,
Friends come. (Ed. note:  That they do…and thank you friends.  Thank you.)

46. Shêng / Pushing Upward

above K’un The Receptive, Earth
below Sun The Gentle, Wind
--- --- 

 

The Judgement

Pushing upward has supreme success.
One must see the great man.
Fear not.
Departure toward the south
Brings good fortune.

The Image

Within the earth, wood grows:
The image of Pushing Upward.
Thus the superior man of devoted character
Heaps up small things
In order to achieve something high and great.

Horoscope: June 26, 2009

// June 26th, 2009 // No Comments » // magick, personal

Daily Sun Sign horoscope
Libra – 26 Jun 2009
If you are holding back from a serious discussion with workmates or close companions then maybe you need to think of some way of breaking the ice. There may have been more criticism around than usual recently but you could also be misconstruing something you have only half heard. Check it out before jumping to conclusions. Tidy up misconceptions.

Daily Vedic Moon Sign horoscope
Capricorn – 26 Jun 2009
 You may be feeling impulsive and may be forthright in your expressions today. You like to dominate the day at work or at home with your confidence and recklessness. Careful though, as you tend to get carried away with your convictions as your friends and colleagues may not be able to keep pace with you.

Daily Chinese Sign horoscope
Dog – 26 Jun 2009
You could have a very good day at work if you can channel all your unbridled energy into results today. There could be some type of performance evaluation going on today, so you may want to be extra productive on this day. You may want to start off your weekend with l little get together of friends that you have not seen in a while.

Today’s Horoscope for Libra
Optimism fades into realism today as your big ideas collide with a serious dose of the truth. You weren’t purposefully avoiding the facts; it’s just that some of them were hidden from your view. Now, finally, you get to see what you were missing, and it’s enough to make you doubt your previous wisdom. But don’t be too hard on yourself if you didn’t know then what you know now. Just make the best choices possible in the present moment and get on with your life.

The Moon is Increasing in Light
The next phase will be the First Quarter at 7:29 am Jun, 29 2009
An auspicious time for affairs and businesses which are at an expansive stage of development, as well as for new beginnings. A growth phase: stimulate the growth of plants which bear fruit above the earth now, and cut hair to accelerate its growth.

The Moon is in Leo
The desire to be noticeable, appreciated, and to feel you are the centre of other people’s attention will be dominant. There is a stronger than usual desire to hear praise, and your emotions will be expressed vividly and openly. This is a good time to perform and appear on stage, to play, create and do everything which inspires you and lets you express your inner self. However, your ability to perceive details and nuances could deteriorate at this time.

The Moon is Void-of-Course
The Void-of-Course period will continue from 8:28 am Jun, 26 2009 to 1:48 pm Jun, 26 2009

HEXAGRAM #50:  THE CAULDRON
This hexagram symbolizes a rich cauldron of vitality and nourishment. It is an indication of supreme good fortune and an indication that your mind, body and soul will be well taken care of. The caldron is a container for your hopes, dreams and prayers. It is like a spiritual vessel that stores and then carries your dreams to fruition. Any apparent obstacles in your way will dissolve or be altered in such a way that they then act to propel your endeavors forward.  But remember that you are what you consume.  Good things come from good thoughts and energies.

SI VIS PACEM, PARA BELLUM

// June 26th, 2009 // No Comments » // life the universe and everything


SI VIS PACEM, PARA BELLUM

Originally uploaded by chinagrrrl

“if you seek peace, prepare for war”

1. Abrahadabra; the reward of Ra Hoor Khut.
2. There is division hither homeward; there is a word not known. Spelling is defunct; all is not aught. Beware! Hold! Raise the spell of Ra-Hoor-Khuit!
3. Now let it be first understood that I am a god of War and of Vengeance. I shall deal hardly with them.
4. Choose ye an island!
5. Fortify it!
6. Dung it about with enginery of war!
7. I will give you a war-engine.
8. With it ye shall smite the peoples; and none shall stand before you.
9. Lurk! Withdraw! Upon them! this is the Law of the Battle of Conquest: thus shall my worship be about my secret house.

A sure cure for sociopathy

// June 26th, 2009 // No Comments » // life the universe and everything


sure_sociopathy

Originally uploaded by chinagrrrl

Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang

Love, Love, Love

// June 26th, 2009 // No Comments » // spirit

This sky where we live
Is no place to lose your wings,
So love, love, love.
- Hafiz -

CC Daily Wisdom: “Rewarding Relationships”

// June 26th, 2009 // No Comments » // CC

Apparently I’m a “corporate cunt” because I can obtain gainful employment and draw a regularly appearing paycheck and support my family.  So be it.  So, in the spirit of embracing my corporate cuntiness I’m going to be bringing forth the little snippets of wisdom bestowed upon me from the oracle known as “Franklin Covey planning pages”.  Today we get some wise words on “rewarding relationships”:

“Some relationships may be easier and more rewarding than others, so make sure you’re spending the greatest amount of time with the people who bring an easy joy to your life.  Their support and love will help you get through tough times at work.”

- Never Check E-Mail in the Morning, p.28

Now, back to your regularly scheduled day.